Sometimes you run into people who are extra friendly—people who are in a tearing hurry to make friends—people who try to get chummy in no time. Some of them might be largest-hearted, genuine people. But, more often than not, most of the people from this tribe are cunning and selfish by nature. So, you need to learn how to put your foot down howsoever mildly in the beginning and be a little blunt when the matter begins to get out of your hands.
If someone engages in a long conversation during your very first meeting, and express their desire to meet you again, give it a serious thought. Go over the content of your conversation and try to assess as to what they were trying to driving at. If you have the slightest doubt that they were trying to find out as to how they could use you, try to delay the meeting. Tell them you have a busy time ahead and that you will inform them when this meeting could be fixed. Then, take your time and decide sensibly. You don’t want to regret a bad choice later in the day.
There are people who think nothing of societal norms and start discussing relationships, body, choices, personal issues etc. In other words, they try to get under your skin and dig out all they can in their very first meeting with you. Take note of such people and keep them at arm’s length unless you too belong to the same tribe. Tell them you are in no mood to discuss such matters at that point in time. In fact, you may never want to part with your personal information because that could be detrimental to your interests in the long run. Or, tell them that you feel uncomfortable facing an unsolicited interview to a total stranger. Nobody needs to know all those details about you unless you are being considered for a job.
Some people may invite you to a private dinner at their home or at some eatery so that they could get to know you better. No harm in that. But try to weigh the pros and cons of such meetings ahead of time and respond accordingly. If you don’t feel like going, just thank them for the invite and tell that you are too busy over the weekend or the day of the invitation.
While some take it easy, some others may be in a hurry to get whatever they can at the very first opportunity. They might make you feel that you are in a flight and your co-passenger is desperate to seek a favour before getting off that flight. If you find yourself in such a spot, find a way to get off that flight.
Similarly, people may try to drag you into controversial situations and coax you to take sides. Don’t get trapped in such situations. You don’t want to be a party to something you have nothing to do with. Keep yourself away from such toxic people. You need to be on the guard at all times. You need to scan each situation the way CCTV cameras scan everything in the area where they are installed.
There is no dearth of problems in our own lives. There’s no reason why we should invite trouble by getting involved in others’ problems unnecessarily. That is why we need to set our boundaries beyond which it is not in our interest to tread. And, then, safeguard those boundaries with alacrity for a peaceful life.
